Someone Killed The Wonder Chef
by The Green Mage
Summary: Someone has killed the Wonder Chef, and it is up to the group to discover the murderer.
1. The Beginning

**Responding to reviewers from chapter 8 of _Surviving Flanoir_:**

**crystaltears: _Thank you, if you have any questions, just ask_.**

**Zelda's Fox 38: _Sorry, the job of Village Pyro has already been taken, but you can try for crazy guard who likes to catapult out of town. (Don't ask) Spoony-ness will come soon._**

**NomadicOne: _Well, I'm glad you jumped over to see. It's one of the things fan authors write for, other people to enjoy their work._**

**Dragoonknight1:_ The sequel will have Sheloyd, I promise. I have to write what is on my mind before I forget, or I will forget._**

**Wyvern's Darkness: _I couldn't burn Colette, it wouldn't fit into the plot, I'm sorry. Yes, the Sheloyd took a while, but you can't just have Lloyd suddenly realize it, he'd have to go through something first. This isn't the AE, and anyone could add a suggestion._**

**Mizu:_ Thanks, I hoped it was a humorous ending; you do have to feel sorry for the poor seamonkies though._**

**YAAAY!!: _I don't' have the heart to kill Colette, another author did and it was depressing, even though it was a Sheloyd fic. I'm glad you love the story._**

GM: Okay, this is a Humor/Mystery/Romance fiction, but I could only fit the first two.

Anti: Why not just label it general?

Conscious: YOU SPEAK TO ME OF IMPUDENCE!!! THAT IS IMPUDENCE!!!!!!!

Bane: Oh shut up.

GM: My muses are relatively insane….

Anti: Okay, I'll do the disclaimer, before doom befalls us all. **Disclaimer: Green Magi does not own Namco or Tales of Sympthonia or Edgar**

Conscious: Um, Doom only opens if someone opens it…

Anti: I was being sarcastic…

Bane: But the game doesn't make sense, why do people make the same mistake of opening the portal so many times?

GM: (shakes head) Anyway, now I will give the immunity passes to Two Characters. Genis, here's yours.

Genis: Cool, so I don't get knocked unconscious, maimed, or wounded?

GM: Yup. (for the first two)

Zelos: Why not me? All the worlds' women will grieve if I die.

Edgar: That's MY line (takes out chainsaw)

Zelos: Oops…

GM: Genis gets it because he's my favorite character of ToS.

Colette: Why him?

GM: Because he can use magic.

(all sweat drop)

Raine:** I** use magic!

GM: So? You heal, who cares if you can cure yourself if your enemy is dead before they can make another move?

Raine: I am so going to kill you.

GM: Ignore Raine, anyway, Presea, you get one to.

Presea: (moves head to one side) Why?

GM: Do I need a reason? Anyway, on to the story.

* * *

The Wonder Chef was found dead in the Sylverant Renegade Base. The suspects are; 

Lloyd Irving, the Wonder Chef said he shouldn't eat all meat.

Colette Brunel, cooks with all fruits, but is too innocent to kill someone cold blood.

Genis Sage, the Wonder Chef never told him how he disappeared.

Raine Sage, horrible cooking, the Chef had insulted her once.

Kratos Aurion: Cooks with 4,000 year old recipes. Kind of sword crazy.

Sheena F: Cooks with Pineapple, Assassin, might have killed him for fun.

Presea Combatir, cooks too extravagantly, prime suspect.

Zelos Wilder, saw the Wonder Chef flirting with one of his floozies.

Regal Bryant, was always 2nd to the Great Chef.

Yuan, the murder was conducted in the Sylverant Renegade base.

* * *

"So, we need to find the murderer before he or she strike again." Yuan finished telling his story to the party who were just outside Flanoir ready to take off. 

"How could we have done it? The Rehairds just started working two days ago." Lloyd argued with the age old half elf. The snow was currently subsiding, and you could see the clouds.

"Well, we did all go off to different places for different reasons." Raine intervened; the two warriors would be killing each other soon.

"Yah, you dragged me off to the Triet Ruins and— OW!" Genis stated before being slapped by Raine. He only had a few pinkish tints in his hair left over from the shampoo.

"Anyway, you all have to come with me." Yuan demanded, only to meet snickers.

"WHAT!" Yuan screeched out, he hated being left out on jokes.

"Heheheh, your hair is on fire, hahahahah!" Zelos told Yuan, whose head, was on fire. Yuan started running all over, and then banged his head against the snow covered ground.

"Well that was…disturbing." Presea added her monotone opinion. She turned to her friends, "If we go, there is a higher probability of Yuan no longer bothering us."

"Good idea Presea!" Genis blurted out, blushing as he said it.

"Let's hurry then," Sheena input, trying to save the poor boy any more embarrassment.

"We only have seven working Rehairds, one of us will have to share…" Regal added, somewhat distracted that the Wonder Chef was dead, poor Chef.

"I know my voluptuous beauty will be honored to join me," Zelos said, looking at Sheena.

"Pbbt, yeah right. How about when the Nifleim freezes over? You know what, not even when the Nifleim freezes over, because I don't want to be flying over ice." Sheena replied to the perverted playboy.

"Come on O' Great Beauty, join me?" Zelos asked her again.

"How about, NOT!" Sheena punched Zelos, who flinched from the punch to his face.

"It's over between us Sheena; no one makes me bleed my own blood." He told her, quoting _Dodge Ball_. His lip was a little bloated and bleeding a little bit, but it was okay in total.

"Um… Sheena can ride with me, if she wants to…" Lloyd said quietly, so only Sheena and everyone who wasn't Zelos could hear. No one noticed other than Sheena though; they were too busy watching Zelos is pain.

"Can we go now, the sooner it is over the better." Raine said in that tone that meant we-are-going-and-no-arguments-or-else-extreme-pain-will-befall-you.

"Okay then, here you go." Yuan handed Raine two coconuts.

"What are THESE for?" Raine asked him suspiciously.

"Well, you bang them together, and it sounds like a horse." Yuan told the Grand Healer like she should know that.

"And why would I want to bang them together?" She was starting to lose her composure; somebody was going to be in serious pain if Yuan didn't stop.

"So we can sound like we're on horses" Regal answered before Yuan, who had a surprised look for a second, then it went back to normal.

"FINE!!! AND I MIGHT AS WELL DANCE WITH ZELOS WHILE I'M AT IT!!!!" Count down on Raine's anger clock had begun.

"Nobody asked you to dance with Zelos sis." Genis interrupted her death glare.

"Look, the Angry Mob from chapter 8!" Zelos said that, and then jumped on his purple Rehaird. "Quickly, to the Zelos Cave!"

After everyone except Lloyd and Sheena had gotten on, the mob was closer than they were comfortable. The Green Rehaird was the only one left.

"Well Sheena, here we go." Lloyd told her as he boarded the rehaird, excited about flying again. "Don't let go", he warned before taking off.

"I don't want to let go…" Sheena whispered to herself, off in dream world, not noticing how tightly she held on to Lloyd.

"Hey Sheena!" Genis called from his rehaird, moving close, but not so close that it would crash and burn.

"What?!" Sheena didn't enjoy falling asleep and then waking up a few seconds later.

"You're choking Lloyd, I just thought you should know." He said in that smart-alecky way that he was famous for. Lloyd was in fact turning purple, Sheena was holding on a bit too tight.

"Sorry Lloyd!" Sheena loosened her death grip as the purple receded from Lloyd's face.

While this was happening, Colette and Presea were in an intimate debate about……………………………………………......................................................................................................................................………Colette's wings.

"Wings aren't _that_ great." Presea argued, "You need to use extra energy to move a wing, which humans are not supposed to have."

"Oh come on silly!" Colette responded in that cheerful way that anyone who has even heard about ToS knows about. "You see such beautiful views, and they're so pretty!"

"My wings are so awesome, everybody fear me!" Zelos decided to add his opinion which was worth about zero on the world market.

"Oh, I like your wings too Zelos," Colette told the other Chosen, "But mine are much better than yours."

"Colette, you wound me." Zelos looked like he was hit by Genis' Indignation Judgment. Then of course, because he wasn't looking, he flew into a rain cloud and after a few minutes, got out and was soaked to the core.

"Yuan, how did the Wonder Chef die?" Raine asked the Renegade Leader, after stifling her laughter, she so enjoyed seeing Zelos in pain and/or annoyed.

"Apparently, a bucket of Rehaird grease was above a door, and when he opened it, he was doused, then, something caused him to set on fire." Yuan told the Professor, who was looking back toward her companions.

Suddenly, Zelos' face grew pale and he fell off his Rehaird onto the sands of Triet, right next to the sandworm nest. Fortunately, (or unfortunately), the sandworms were busy chowing down on some creature who's form was too disfigured too tell what it was. A worm looked up toward the chosen, but went back to chewing a few seconds later.

"We might as well save him..." Lloyd said, with a tired sigh in his voice, he was always looking after Zelos. The only thing Zelos did was get them lost and in trouble with villagers all over the worlds.

"Do we have too?" came from Raine and Sheena simultaneously, Sheena in a semi-tired voice, while Raine was on the edge of rune mode, they were passing near the Triet Ruins.

"If he dies, we have to fill out all the paperwork, and do we have time to save the world AND file meaningless paperwork?" Regal was the voice of reason, which he sometimes hated being.

They came down and Presea grudgingly picked Zelos up, and they had to walk the rest of the way to the Base, no one wanted to have Zelos with them, who would have thought? (Sarcasm.)

When they finally got there, Colette gave a cough, and started hacking all over the place, eventually ending up on her knees with her hand on the ground.

"Pro-fe-sor..." Colette gasped out, "C-an'-t ta...lk" after stuttering this out, she promptly shut her mouth and looked at the silver-haired half elf pleadingly.

"Well, then you must have…" Raine took a dramatic pause, "Laryngitis. It causes you to have a sore throat and very limited speaking ability, the best way to recover is to not talk at all." And at this, there was silent rejoicing among the party; Colette was becoming too annoying of late.

Colette nodded her head, and then put her hand over her mouth like she was going to be sick. She ran to the other side of the base, and was over there for a few minutes, leaving the 8 to just stand around and do nothing. She came back out, smiling like nothing happened.

"Well that was…awkwardly disturbing," Presea added her opinion, which was what everyone was thinking, but didn't want to say outloud. Presea dropped Zelos onto the sand, (un)fortunately, Zelos hit a rock. "It is your turn to carry him Colette".

Colette just continued to smile and picked Zelos up, and started to move forward up the stairs of the base. Everyone expected her to trip, but she didn't.

"Hey Lloyd," Sheena whispered to him while everyone was watching Colette. "You know that wish I made on that shooting star at Flanoir before Zelos betrayed us? It was that this would happen to Zelos".

"Well, apparently it worked." Lloyd turned toward the ninja and whispered, "Remember, it was Raine who cooked, so maybe she poisoned him."

Genis heard their voices but not what they said, and stared at the warrior and ninja, who were standing directly next to each other. _Could it be that Lloyd like Sheena? Or, does Sheena like Lloyd? GAH! My head, IT BURNS! This happens every time I have a problem that seems unsolvable… Let's see, Lloyd is too thick headed to notice if someone likes him, or is he? Problem isn't mathematical, MY HEAD HURTS!_

"Raine…" Regal was taking a chance, "Did Zelos eat the fish?"

"Yes… why?" Raine answered, puzzled.

"The fish was poisoned, but it will wear off in a few minutes…" As an after thought, Regal added, "You aren't banging the coconuts".

The Renegade Base doors opened, only to reveal a familiar face, Kratos. In his normal purple outfit, and with that trademark frown on his face he walked down and pretty much pushed everyone in.

"Kratos, what are you doing here?" Raine asked the angelic mercenary, a small blush appearing on her face as they stopped in the hall with the GameCube.

"Apparently I'm a suspect, I don't know why." Kratos glared at Yuan who was looking at the ground kicking at a non existent rock.

A sound that meant the ways out of the base were closed sounded. This meant that there was another person in the base other than themselves, a high probability it was the killer.

"Yuan, where are the other Renegades? This place is empty." Sheena asked with a tiny miniscule amount of fear in her voice. She absent mindedly moved closer to Lloyd.

"I sent them out to get the people on my hit list." Yuan told them, receiving stares.

"You have a hit list?" Genis asked the Renegade leader, who was fidgeting again.

"No, um…What hit list? Just forget everything I said about that okay." Yuan stuttered for the first half but regained his composure. _Note to self, think before saying anything._

"So, we are stuck, in a base, with a murderer?" Raine had an edge to her voice that would have split stone. She just noticed she was missing her staff, how was she going to bash people without it? "Where's my staff?"

"Pretty much and I don't know." Yuan told her smiling; he was as ignorant as Lloyd and Presea sometimes.

"How about we split up and search that way, a pair searching each part of the base?" Zelos suddenly woke up and gave his useless opinion. Which they decided to take for once.

"That sounds like a good idea!" Kratos said, "And why don't we leave our weapons here too? Haven't you ever read any horror books, boy? Every time you split up, YOU DIE!" the angel shook his head, how could people not see the obvious?

"I think we should do it." Regal said to no one in particular, "I will search the kitchen!" He started to take a step toward the door, when he remembered that he needs a partner. "Everyone move to whom you want your partner to be, I'll take whoever."

Sheena and Lloyd stayed where they were; they already were next to each other. Genis moved shyly to Presea's side, who just looked at him and gave a nano-second quick smile. Raine moved next to Kratos, who was devising a plan to escape the base, it hadn't been cleaned for years, and there were pizza boxes all over. Zelos, seeing three of the four girls were taken, immediately stood up and skidded to Colette's side, who just kept on smiling. So it seemed Yuan and Regal were stuck as a team.

"Let's go!" Raine was enthusiastic; she might sneak a peek at some of the base's magi-technology. And so the teams set off in separate directions.

* * *

GM: Well, there you have it, the first chapter of the sequel. 

Anti: You forgot the AE to the last one…

GM: First this.

Bane: Well, any comments are appreciated.

Conscious: This isn't a Celos, it's a Sheloyd, Gesea, and a touch of Kraine.

Anti: Well, the killer has already been decided, and nothing can change it, just so you know.


	2. PI & a kiss

_**Reviewer Response:**_

**_Wyvern's Darkness:_ So I'm the King of Humor? Huh, others are more deserving I think. There will be Sheloyd & Gesea, and I have a VERY special punishment for Zelos…**

**_NomadicOne:_ Thanks. Genis is going to have some trouble with that, just wait…**

**_Lloyd (Irving) Aurion:_ No, the Dark Chef wants the Ultimate Recipe, so he wouldn't kill the Wonder Chef until he has it. And there will be more romance.**

**_Balderdash_: Only the Wonder Chef dies. The rest are just put through some type of unfortunate experience. (But not all of them)**

**_Mizu:_ I'm writing more, was just away for a few days, and I need to think of everyone's torture… I mean event.**

Bane: And now the 2nd chapter.

GM: Yes, I changed my pen-name; I'm going with the full one. Magi was an abbreviation of Magicite, which is what an Esper (or Summon), leaves behind when they die. It passes magical powers to the one who holds it after gaining experience, and can summon the former Esper/summon. Magicite & Esper comes from Final Fantasy VI, my 2nd favorite Final Fantasy.

Anti: For those who want to know who the murderer is now, there are clues in chapter I…

Conscious: Don't give them hints! It will ruin the story.

Bane: Crazy muses… **Anyway, Disclaimer: Green Magicite does not own Namco or Tales of Sympthonia or PI**

**You may want to skip PI**

* * *

Sheena, Lloyd, Genis, and Presea took a left. Kratos & Raine went up the stairs. Zelos & the not-speaking-for-once Colette inspected the main hallway. Yuan & Regal were in the kitchen, because Regal wanted to see all the recipes from 4,000 years ago. 

"So we finally get to explore the Renegades Base." Lloyd started out enthusiastic, like normal; let's see how long that lasts. "After being stuck in here twice, we still haven't' found the snack bar."

At this everyone (in his group, they already left) stared. Was there a snack bar in the Base? And how would he know? Besides, Yuan didn't seem like the snack bar type. He seemed more like the formal dinner type. But of course there were quite a few Renegades who might have added a snack bar in the enormous base.

"How would you know of the existence of a snack bar in this area?" Presea was not monotone this time, her voice sounded curious. "At maximum you would be here only 4 times, and you would be directed to wherever Yuan wanted the group at that time. Therefore, it would be impossible to know the existence of a snack bar."

"Well…" Lloyd paused for a moment to answer the pink haired girl, "there's always a snack bar!" He said the way he told Sheena that Genis & Raine were elves when they first entered Tethella.

As this argument continued between the Swordsman & the Berserker, the hallway that they were in had no end in sight. But there were creepy portraits on the wall, with the eyes following them. And the customary suits of armor that you'd see in any castle scene in a horror movie.

_When Yuan was decorating this, he must have been reading Katzenstein._ Genis thought as he walked down the hall next to Presea, for once not thinking about how to impress her. _Must not get distracted by Yuan's horrible mistakes, must get back to Lloyd & Sheena problem. _Genis couldn't think correctly when he was close to Presea, & to top it off there were many things on his mind at the same time; horror books, Presea, the paintings, Presea, Lloyd & Sheena, Presea, new recipes, Presea. It was slowly leading his mind to a meltdown.

"Lloyd, how will we know when we find a clue?" Sheena asked the swordsman, who wasn't getting bored easily. His New Year's Resolution was to maintain enthusiasm.

"Well, we'll tell when we see it. I'm sure of it!" Lloyd responded to the ninja, "We can't let the Wonder Chef down, I mean, after all the recipes he taught us. We'd still be making sandwiches if it wasn't for him. And although I like sandwiches, too much wouldn't be good for me." Lloyd was trying to send Sheena a telepathic message, like Colette had sent him that fateful day in the Tower of Salvation. _Sheena, do you remember when we were first here together? How I mistook your feelings as that of a friend. I had no idea you liked me, I swear._

"The Wonder Chef did nothing other than-WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Presea slipped on an orange peel, and landed on the floor, hard. Of all the luck, she needed to ask Colette where she found that lucky Angel Bracelet, she could do with one of them about now.

"Genis, aren't you going to help her up?" Sheena asked the boy, who looked like Presea did before they gave her the Crest. His eyes devoid of emotion, like he was focusing on something else, he pulled Presea up, and then kept walking.

"What's his problem?" Lloyd asked. He thought Genis would be honored to help Presea up, he likes her, doesn't he? "Presea, you follow Genis, Sheena & I will explore this lower level that opens to the left." And as he said Genis, Presea took off after him. "I guess she doesn't care where we go."

"Lloyd, shouldn't we follow them? There could be traps like that cave that we fell into." Sheena asked the swordsman, then shivered at the thought of that cave, although it did show Lloyd how he felt for her.

"The one where I set you on fire, you fell into a pit, I set you on fire again, you were almost eaten by a Snow Bunny, you were darted, and nearly crushed by tons of rocks?" Lloyd remembered that, it would seem funny to him if it hadn't happened to them. "I'm sure they'll be fine, now, let's explore the room that says in bold letters, **Keep Out, No Admittance**. There's bound to be something in there." He knew Sheena would agree, she had a sense of adventure that was equal to his. And she would never pass up a chance for Treasure Hunting.

"Yes, let's go! Oh, and Lloyd," Sheena stopped the 17 year old; "I'll race you there!" With that, she raced for the door.

"Oh no you don't!" Lloyd, instead of running, used his brain. He slid down the banister faster than Sheena could run down, and tagged the door just before she got there. "Shall we?" Lloyd pushed open the door, and inside, there was….

A room dedicated to Martel. There were statues, as well as pictures of Martel's face everywhere, Martel plushies. Anything that could have a Martel on it did. Except the carpet, Yuan didn't want to walk on Martel's face. In the right hand corner, there were portraits of Martel & Yuan together, both smiling, they were taken before the scene which both Sheena & Lloyd remembered from that brief time that Sheena was under Mithos' control. And in the very center of the room, was a pedestal missing a ring.

"Oh goddess…" Lloyd murmered as he grabbed the bag which held everything. He pulled out a ring with a Y & M on it. "This is theirs… he dropped it at Hima…"

Sheena was also in shock, "Lloyd, we should return it to its rightful place." She tugged on his arm, not hard, but to awaken him from his shocked state.

"Yes, we should do that," he agreed with the Summoner, and placed the ring on its place of honor. He turned toward Sheena, "I think we should leave, we shouldn't have intruded."

"…What?" Sheena was just daydreaming, if she and Lloyd were married, and then had a room like this, showing how deeply they loved each other, in a secret basement under wherever they were to move Mizuho. "Uh, yah let's go." She blushed at the thought, she and Lloyd together, what a wonderful dream.

As they moved to the room across from the aptly named 'Martel Room', they found it was half littered with trash, the Renegades weren't very clean. Sheena shut the door behind her, and the Magic Lock went into place, sealing them inside.

"Um… Lloyd." Sheena placed her hand on his shoulder to grab his attention; it caused a shiver to go down his back, not a scared shiver, but a good shiver. "The door is locked; do you have the Sorcerer's Ring?" She asked him.

"I uh, gave it to Raine to hold…" He muttered out, hoping Sheena wasn't angry. He had seen Sheena angry at Zelos, and it wasn't pretty, not pretty at all.

"That's okay" Sheena had a smile on her lips.

"But we'll be stuck here until someone opens the door from the outside, wouldn't that bother you?" Lloyd asked her, then he noticed the smile on her lips. "What? Is there…"

He was cut off as Sheena leaned forward and kissed him, he returned the kiss (of course). It wasn't short, it kept going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going, until they needed oxygen.

"Well that" Lloyd was panting heavily, "Was fun."

"Yes, let's" Sheena was also panting heavily, everyone needs oxygen, "Do it again." She suggested to Lloyd, who readily agreed.

**(Let's leave them and go see what Genis and Presea are doing)**

After Presea finally caught up with Genis, she started trying to make a conversation. But because Genis was acting like her, he didn't say a word. Presea was frazzled, what was causing him to do this? What? What could possible make Genis into a soulless like state?

_Must, figure out Lloyd. Sheena likes Lloyd, I have that down. But doesn't Lloyd like Colette? Or maybe he sees her as a sister… But Lloyd's too naïve to notice that Sheena likes him; it took forever for me to explain that Zelos was going to betray us before he did. The guy's with long hair are ALWAYS evil, no exception. Well, not Regal, he has long hair because he couldn't cut it… I'll edit the rule then: Any guy with long hair, who can cut it, is evil. NO! I'm going off topic!_ This was all going through Genis' head as he walked like a zombie down the hallway.

"Fine then Genis, I'll force you to talk" Presea couldn't stand it, how could Genis survive talking to her like this? He must have a lot of patience, which she didn't have right then. "I'm going to……………………..poke you! Face my wrath!" And so Presea started to poke Genis.

_I'll put it in Math…_

Pokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepoke  
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_S is S NO! I don't have to state that! It's already known! _

_S plus L?_

_S plus Z Total Chaos_

_L plus C Friends_

_So would SL equal love? NO WAY! Lloyd can't find his soul mate before I do?! Well, maybe I have, but Presea doesn't like me, she caused me to fall off a cliff like platform. Life isn't fair…_

Pokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepoke  
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_NOOOO! The poking interfering…with problem….must concentrate. _Then a little voice in Genis head said "**14 seconds to Left side of Brain Meltdown."**

**13**

**12**

**11**

**10**

**9**

**8**

**7**

Pokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepoke  
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**3**

**2**

**1**

**CRITICAL!**

Presea watched as steam came out of Genis' ears. Then he would have fallen backwards, if she hadn't caught him at the last moment. She gazed into the eyes of the half-elf, searching for any damage she may have done to the poor boy. Then, the horrible, horrible realization hit her, she broke Genis by poking him.

"Genis! GENIS! Speak to me!" Presea tried to awaken Genis from his slumber, to no avail. In desperation, she came up with an idea, "Genis, what is the recipe of Pie?" She asked him, hoping, no, praying that he could answer.

Genis answered in a monotone that would not only match, but beat her own. "PI equals" He took a deep breath,

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066559489445924628661996355635065262340533943914211127181069- UGH!" Genis screamed the last word.

Now, we know we should never ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever,  
ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever,  
ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever,  
ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever,  
ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever,  
ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever,  
ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever,  
ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, EVER use pressure points, but Presea  
didn't have much of a choice, it was either that, or hitting him with Bahamut's Tear, which would have done more  
damage than help.

Genis was about to hit the ground, when Presea grabbed hold of him, and picked him up, bride-groom style (With her holding Genis). And carried him off to the Lloyd & Sheena, surely they would know what to do. Well Sheena, Lloyd isn't anything of a healer, but Sheena could summon Udine to heal him, right?

After Presea get's to the room

Presea opens the door, to find Lloyd and Sheena about to kiss…again. They turn red and stare at the pink-haired girl, who's staring at them at the same time.

"Umm…ugh…Presea, we were just…" Lloyd stuttered out words, he and Sheena hadn't told anyone yet. An entirely random idea popped into his head. "Cleaning! & Sheena asked me if their was an eyelash stuck in her eye, so I was looking for it." He nudged Sheena for her to play along.

"Uh, what Lloyd said." Sheena was blushing like mad, they were caught, would Presea buy it? And if she didn't, what would she think? Let's find out.

_Well, half the room looks clean, and Lloyd wouldn't lie, or would he. No, he wouldn't, unless he had a very good reason; so they must be cleaning. Don't worry Genis, Udine will save you!_ The pink haired girl motioned to Genis. "He…Fell down some stairs, so can Udine heal him?" Presea had switched back to Monotone, so it sounded like her normal self.

"No, I'm sorry, there's nothing I can do." Sheena told the girl. _Is that, a tear? No, I must be dreaming, Presea never cries. _"Let's get out before that door closes again." She moved to keep the door open, luckily just in time.

"Come on, we'll wait for Raine in Yuan's office." Lloyd told the group of 3 (including him, Genis doesn't count). _Let's see what Yuan keeps in his office…_ Lloyd had an evil smirk for a moment, then got rid of it.

The 3 headed back to the office, where everyone would meet after searching their area's.

* * *

GM: Next chapter, everybody else! 

Bane: Oh and it's not Colette.

Everyone other than Bane: DON'T TELL THEM!

Anti: Well, any comments or…

GM: They know already.

Genis: How dare you melt my brain?

GM: Because you are unsure of everything, goodbye people, see you on another story, or here next time. Now I'm going to listen to Dancing Mad (Kefka).


	3. I am Czar!

**_Responding to Reviewers:_**

**Wyvern's Darkness: I can be as cruel to the Energizer Bunny as I want to. And thanks for the compliment.**

**Lloyd (Irving) Aurion: For some reason, they don't let you post URLs in a review...most of the time anyway. Something already did happen to Presea, she was forced to listen to 50.000 Numerals of PI, that's enough punishment for a life-time. Do they have to tell everyone? They're already going on the ex-sphere journey together. But, I should include it in the next chapter (4).**

**Macross-Green: Sad...? Well, once you see the ending (which is kinda stupid) you'll see it isn't sad. Presea should have know better, it's going to come back to haunt her...**

**Zelda's Fox 38: Yes, it is irrational. And do you know what's scarier? I know a 15 year old who's memorized over 700 numerals of it.**

**acoustic3: Romance isn't my specialty,but I'll try to add more-but not in this chapter.**

**littlelives: I gave him a pass, remember? I just thought it'd be funny to recite PI, unfortunatly, 2 characters are eaten in this chapter.**

**warprince2000: Hmm, two characters are eaten, one comes back to life, another is trapped in a basement, and one is knocked out.**

**Invader Skye: Do you reallythink I'd make up PI!**

**ObviousMan**: **CALL GENIS OFF! AHHH!**

**

* * *

**

GM: Hey everybody! I'm sorry for the delay, but it couldn't be helped.

Bane: Yes it could have, you're just saying that. You spent the last weeks dominating Final Fantasy VI and-

GM: How did you know about that? Besides, Final Fantasy VI isn't a game, it's a religion.

Bane: I'm your fan-character, remember? Older brother of Rune, I'm the crazy dark elf chemist?

Rune: How could you make me an unsociable half-dark elf? WHY?

Metron: Hahahaha! I'm a Necromancer who either becomes a Lich or a Vampire!

Anti: Oh shut up! I'm dominating Conscious at LOTR: BFME!

GM: Well, yes. I suppose…

Bane: I'll do the **disclaimer; Green Magicite does not own Tales of Sympthonia or Namco. Nor does he own the Czar Dragon. That was a spoiler, wasn't it?**

GM: I feel like writing a crossover…

Bane: NOOO! Remember what happened _last _time!

GM: I've never written one before.

Bane: Exactly!

GM: ………….Well, this chapter contains Yuan Bashing, Zelos Bashing, some more bashing, an enemy from a game I was recently playing, and foreshadowing. coughhackwheezecolettecoughwheezehackchoke

Conscious: You forgot to mention that the Kratos-Raine is one sided.

* * *

Regal and Yuan had left for the kitchens, it is that Regal wished to steal all the cookbooks and perfect the Omega Rice Ball. Why? Because I turned him into a psychopathic cook, but that is enough of that. The door leading to the kitchen was guarded by a ferocious, evil, terrifying, demonic, ancient, psycho-maniac, necromancer-made wooden door!

"That's ALL you have, guarding the kitchen?" Regal asked amazed, Yuan was normally a careful half-elf, not stupid like this. "It's the most important room EVER CREATED and you don't even protect it!"

"Well what do you have on your kitchen?" Yuan asked, getting out the keys. Regal thought back, all the way back about 18 years ago…_Make sure you keep the guards there at all times, it must not be opened for anyone other than myself. Are the high Voltage locks on? I want an anti-matter ray just in case someone tries to open it._

"A bit more than this," Regal stated as he watched Yuan fumble around with the keys. With a sigh, he moved closer to the door. "Mirage!" and by using the tech, his molecules disassembled and reassembled on the other side of the door, from there, he took off the lock and opened the door, to face Yuan. "Well, what are you waiting for? I want the cookbooks."

"Is a cookbook _that_ important to you?

"Try living without one."

"Well, the cookbooks are over here, come on." Yuan said and walked over to the counter. "Let's see…_Cooking with Mithos, Martel's Old Fashioned Recipes_…There should be more in the basement, I'll go check."

Meanwhile, Regal was hiding each book he could find, every single one. He was cleaning Yuan out, it's not like it mattered, he was 4000, and he could easily replace _4000 Year old Cooking, Original Edition_.

"Grr…" Yuan was attacking the stubborn door that led to the basement, slightly aware of what Regal was doing. Once he got it open, he stepped through, and tripped on the skate board that he had left there 3847 years ago. The door shut and locked after him.

"Don't worry Yuan! I the great Regal Bryant will save thee!" Regal was about to go save Yuan when he found a recipe for Crab Cakes. "Mmmmm, Crab Cakes…" Taking the cookbook with him, he left back for the room where they were to meet, completely forgetting about Yuan.

"Ow! This stu-GAH! –pid door will

YEOCH-AY!" Yuan screeched as he hit every single step, resulting in massive pain. Once he finally hit the bottom, after about 35 flights of getting bruised, he heard a familiar voice.

"Lord Yuan! You found me, I need to tell you that I completed my mission." The voice said with an obvious accent.

Yuan had heard it many times before, "Botta! You're alive!" He moved toward the figure, which looked worse off than him.

"Of course sir," Botta said confused, he wasn't going to die anytime soon.

"But Lloyd had said you died," Yuan was desperately trying to regain his composure. "Therefore, I am in a memory which must have been knocked out from when I fell down the stairs."

"That hurts, seeing as how I escaped, they had forgotten to close the window." Botta replied, then asked, "So, how has life been?"

"Well, I-" Yuan started to tell Botta what happened, but seeing as how that would bore most of the reviewers to death, let's skip it and see how Raine Kratos are doing.

* * *

"Look! That must have been from the-" Raine was ranting on again. Something about ruins and whatnot, she hasn't realized Kratos wasn't paying attention. It was going in one ear and out the other.

"Look! A relic from uh…3478 years ago!" Kratos said with pretend enthusiasm. He had to stop Raine from driving him insane.

"Where? WHERE?"

"Over there, beyond the doorway." Kratos continued to lie.

"YAY!" Raine was off.

"Finally, some quite time…" Kratos went over to the couch and sat down. "Oooooooooooooooooooooh! A snack bar!" And it was so, a snack bar was there. It was the Legendary Renegade Snackbar, the one mentioned in the previous chapter. Except I believe I didn't mention that there was a trap with it, one that is older than anyone in this game, one that every character in the game could not defeat. As Kratos moved to push the button on the snack bar, the silent alarm sounded.

"**SILENT ALARM ACTIVATED!"** Rang throughout the room, Yuan forgot to disconnect it from the speaker.

"Well this isn't good…" Kratos had defeated every monster in both Sylverant Tethealla at least 5000 times (he had to do something for 4000 years), but this monster _wasn't_ from either of them.

"_Mwa,ha,ha... Mortals and their desires! I'm free at last! I bring you destruction... I bring you terror... I am Czar! Prepare yourself!"_ a cold voice rang out.

"I hate Mondays…" Kratos muttered before he was eaten.

"_I smell…elf blood."_

"Kratos! This isn't a ruin! It says 'Made in Palmacosta', it's recent." Raine had come back.

"_The human was a tasty snack, but I'm still hungry."_

"Martel! It's the legendary dragon of-AGH!" Raine screamed before being eaten, to put it nicely.

* * *

Colette and Zelos were doing well. They had searched several rooms without Colette talking. All that could be done was Zelos talking to himself.

"Well Colette, how do you think we are doing?" Zelos broke his mindless rant to try and talk to the little angel.

_What's that wings? You want me to kill Zelos?_ 'Colette' was losing it, her wings were colored blue instead of the normal purple-ish.

"Well, I guess you're doing fine, you would have spoken if you weren't."

While Zelos was looking in a door, Colette tripped, thereby opening a secret passage and Zelos falling into it.

"Well, well. It seems as if OUR plan to get the gald is going to work after all…." Colette smirked, and walked back to the room.

"HELP ME! NO NOT THE FACE!" Zelos screamed as he fell, then landed on his face in the darkness.

"Well, well, well, what have we here? A red headed swordsman?" A male voice said, his face clouded in darkness. Zelos had never heard the man before, but the others in the group had.

"A hostage? Oh good!" A female voice sounded, her face also hidden in the darkness.

"Hello my mysterious-" Zelos was starting to hit on her, when he was wacked by her staff.

"Shut up!"

"I don't think we should do this, Gald really isn't that important to kill someone, is it?" A cowardly souding male voice Zelos also heard.

"Just because the blond let you live, doesn't mean-

* * *

GM: Well, it's blatently obvious who is it.

Bane: Indeed. But WHY is Czar there?

GM: Do I need a reason?

Anti: As I say every time, please leave any questions or comments or suggestions by reviewing, thank you.


	4. Genis, what hast thou done?

_**Reviewer Response:**_

**_ObviousMan: Keep Genis off! Too late, Genis, I hereby sentence thee to pain and suffering._**

_**Lloyd (Irving) Aurion: Yes, I have decided to repeal Genis and Presea's immunity pass. removed your story? Why don't you just, repost it or something? What was wrong with it?**_

_**Warprince2000: Let's see, Czar leaves, Lloyd Sheena are, how about you just read the story?**_

_**Zelda's Fox 38: I'll try to keep away from the cooking jokes…I can't promise what types of joke whilst happen now. Yes, you should eat breakfast.**_

_**Shadow Dark-Blade: …Wow, that's a lot of PI…**_

_**Crystaltears: Yes. It is them, the filth, thieving liars.**_

**_Aiwendillie: You call my updating long? You haven't seen long, but that is another story. Thanks for the compliment._**

**_Imildras: Yes, that joke is so old. But you can't kill me; the roads are cased in ICE! it is still snowing. MWAHAHAHAHAHA!_**

* * *

****

GM: How's everyone doing? Good I hope, I've noticed something. The only reason there are so many Shelos stories, is because A) They're one-shots B) They pretty much copy our stories. Like, that Shelos one, um… a Crazy Fluff Moment? The title seems a lot like Lloyd (Irving) Aurion's fic. Hmm… And there was another one, made by another Shelos author, that copied yet another of our fictions. It was in Resurrection, I believe, where Zelos is about to kill Lloyd and Sheena jumps in front, well there, Lloyd is about to kill Zelos and Sheena jumps in front. Plagiarism anyone?

Bane: Is that all?

GM: I'm afraid not Bane. I just looked at the C2 communities, and it shocked me. 8 NEW C2's? I think there is something wrong with that. We had everything covered with 5 C2's, why do we need 13?

Bane: The story! START THE STORY!

Anti: This is almost the last chapter.

Conscious: We're not sure however.

GM: I'm getting there.

Czar: _Mwahahaha! Foolish lawyers and their desires! I'm free at last! I bring you terror… I bring you destruction… I am Czar, PREPARE YOURSELF FOR A **DISCLAIMER: Green Magicite does not own Square Enix, nor does he own Tales of Symphonia or Namco.**_

GM: Oh, and I want to thank Czar for eating Kratos Raine. I never liked Raine.

Czar: _She tasted horrible._

GM: I'll take your word for it.

Czar: _She did. Can I start the story?_

Bane: No.

Anti: No.

Conscious: NO!

GM: Sure.

Bane Anti Conscious: WHAT?

GM: He ate Raine; he deserves to start the story.

Czar: _Now, the story begins back at the room where Sheena, Lloyd, Presea carrying Genis are. Lloyd and Sheena are alone; Presea is trying to awaken Genis._

* * *

"Lloyd, what are you reading?" Sheena asked, sitting next to Lloyd on the ground, seeing as how Presea had Genis on the couch, and she was a bit more…emotional about guarding him. And personally, she didn't want Presea angry. Not only did she respect her feelings, but the Cruxis Crystal increased her strength so much that the axe she carried was nothing. And personally, she didn't want to be hit by Bahamut's Tear anytime soon.

"_Great Expectations_" Lloyd answered, looking at Sheena and smiling. He had found the book on the way back from the aptly named, 'Room Across From Martel Room'.

"How is it?"

"It's not all I hoped for."

"It's freezing in here. The place is surrounded by a desert, but inside, I'm freezing. The Renegades have a very messed up sense of humor." Sheena complained, edging closer to Lloyd. "They have all the technology of Cruxis, yet they find it unable to provide decent heat."

"We have to remember that angels don't feel anything, they can't be blamed, can they? They don't care about the hot and cold. They wish to leave." Lloyd responded as he put down the book, and looked at Sheena.

"Wished, you mean. Remember, Mithos emptied out Wegalia. He only left the fighting angels." Sheena reminded Lloyd sounding sorrowful, it was still hard to believe that those who trusted him were all dead.

"I don't believe that they're dead. They were all the same, that's what Mithos wants. I still can't believe we're just sitting here while he's still up there. You still have Mithos' Crystal attached to you." Lloyd said the last part with concern, he still remembered how she saved him after Origin's Battle.

"I told you, I wanted to do that. To protect you…" Sheena murmured the last three words, but because of the distance between them, Lloyd heard her.

"Sheena…" Lloyd softly embraced her. "I will always be there for you."

"Lloyd, do me a favor." Sheena closed her eyes and relaxed in Lloyd's embrace. "Don't let go."

"The god of the summon spirits wouldn't get me to let go." Lloyd assured her, just to find that she was asleep. "Sleep well Sheena, sleep well……You'll be more comfortable on the couch. I'll get you there." He picked up Sheena, and carried her to the next room.

* * *

Presea was futile in trying to awaken Genis, he was similar to the state he would be in stone, immobile. She was getting worried, if he died, then Raine would-would…well, she wasn't sure, but she knew that Raine was protective of Genis, despite her criticism of him.

"Genis, why must you torment me? We both know that Raine is going to flip if she sees you like this." Presea was trying to coax him awake. "I'll make you another carving."

"Pie…" Genis said.

"AHHH!" Presea, thinking that pie was PI, ran into a conveniently located closet and locked it.

"Hehehe, fool." Genis spoke as he stood up. _Now I can ruin everything!_ "A door? Perfect." With this, Genis transported the couch and found a bucket full of water, and set it up, in the normal water-over-the-door trap. "Hahahaha!" He glanced to the side and saw a book on white magic. "Look at me; I'm a crazy archeologist hippie mage! All I do is heal and help others." After a few chuckles at the expense of his sister's magic, he ran out through the back entrance.

"Genis? Are you done with being a crazy, PI-loving, Mana-mastering, half elf?" Presea looked out from the closet. Genis was gone, and all looked well.

**Knock, Knock!**

There was someone knocking, knocking at the door. "It must be Lloyd or Sheena, I'll open it." As Presea moved to the door, she did not see the bucket of water. As she opened the door, she saw Lloyd gently carrying a sleeping Sheena.

"Hey Presea, I was just-" Lloyd began as the bucket of water fell.

Normally this trick was just a minor annoyance. You get hit by a bucket filled with water, you can clean up the water with a towel, and maybe just get a harmless hit from a bucket. However, Lloyd was wearing Volt's gem, so he was fried to a crisp. Sheena was wearing the Aquamarina, as Udine was her first non-fox-thing summon, so she would also be fried, and Presea was wearing Celsius' gem, which is frozen water, so zap to her as well. Let's just say once the zapping was done, we have 3 unconscious heroes.

* * *

"_Still hungry…" Czar growls as he searches the Base. Then, there is a flash of green light. "Rydia, I haven't seen you since the Dragon's Convention!"_

"Alright Czar, time to go back to Final Fantasy VI," Rydia was around 17 years old, with green hair and a matching green robe, with a flaming whip at her side and a general aura of magic surrounding her.

"_I don't wish to go back. This place is weak. They stand no chance of fighting me. Please let me stay!"_

"Czar, we both know that you have to go back to Espera, now, please don't resist. I can easily blow this place to bits with but a single word."

"_Rydia! It's not fair, they didn't put me as a boss, and they-they…THEY PUT ME IN A MARIO GAME!"_

"Czar, it's okay. Let's go."

"_YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!"_

"I was raised by monsters in the Land, what can I not understand? Do you need a demonstration of my powers?"

"_No! It's just…"_

"Too late Czar." Rydia took a spell chanting stance, "How about Weak?"

"…_Please no."_

"WEAK!" A tornado tore through the desert, destroying several Giant Sand Worms, and anything else in the way.

"_Overkill?"_

"There is no such thing as overkill. Now, let's go."

"_Fine."_

"Spit them out."

"_How did you-"_

"I grew up with monsters, remember? I know everything that has to do with them."

"_Fine, but we're stopping at a food place on the way back."_

"Okay, let's go…TELEPORT!" The aura surrounded the Dragon and Caller, whisking them back to Final Fantasy.

* * *

GM: And so, Czar did leave, Rydia did come, and Genis did become psychotic.

Anti: You already know what I est going to say.


	5. Nearly back to Normal

_**Moon Cannon: **Fine, I'll make it longer, thanks for reviewing, your story is good by the way, if a little confusing sometimes._

_**ObviousMan**: Genis has taken on the personality of Black Mage!_

_**Zelda's Fox 38**: Well, how would you feel if Square made you an inaccessible boss in Final Fantasy and staying only as a rumor unless you seriously hack the game? He's been sealed for over 1000 years, no doubt he'd be hungry, but yes, you do have to feel sorry for them. Normally, yes, Lloyd would be zapped pretty badly, but you forget one thing, the Sardenox not only gives electric attack to a weapon, but also gives a slight resistance to it. Yuan is boring Botta to death, but he may have found a way out, I did find a rather Yuan shaped hole in my story…_

_**Lloyd (Irving) Aurion**: Well, I think you should reload it, minus the questions. And don't worry, Genis will be punished; he will have to face the power which is known only to mortals as…Colette Imposter._

_**Warprince2000**: Well, just scroll down, you'll see._

_**Goldfish Demon**: I turned Genis into a prankster; he is a little crazy however, because Sheena & Lloyd caused his brain to melt._

GM: And now, after a delay, the 5th chapter, which is not the last chapter.

Rydia: I'm taking over as muse!

GM: Where'd the others go?

At the Land of the Summoned Monsters

Bane: I blame you for this, Anti.

Anti: How was _I _supposed to know that Czar was one of her best friends from the Land?

Conscious: This is what happens when we let "nice" demonic muses decide stuff.

Bane: Why don't we just try to find our way back?

Back at fanfiction

Rydia: I have _no_ idea.

GM: Really?

Rydia: How about we talk about something else? This chapter contains: Zelos bashing!

GM: Wait! You're supposed to do the disclaimer!

Rydia: Geez, just wait. **Disclaimer: Green Magicite does not own Tales of Symphonia, Namco, Final Fantasy IV or VI, nor Square Enix**

GM: Now, if you are a fan of Zelos, or don't like seeing thepink-haired chosen flirtingwithout shame, I suggest you read this anyway!

_

* * *

_

_Oh my aching head, I feel like I've been stabbed by Last Fencer, then doused by Tidal Wave while being hit by one of Genis' Indignation Judgments… What did happen anyway? _Lloyd was recovering from the bucket of water. _Volt's power…Celsius power…Undine's power…I'm going to get back on Genis for this, he'll see…_ Before Lloyd could continue his plotting, he remembered who he was with, _Sheena! Martel, please let her be okay…_

He opened his eyes, dazed for a few moments. A few feet away from him was Presea, not yet recovered, but peaceful in this 'sleep'. She muttered a few unintelligible words, something about Genis. Focusing on his goal, he looked besides him; Sheena was leaned against the wall, unconscious.

Praying that she wouldn't suffer any serious damage, he gently picked her up and moved her to the couch which was mentioned in the previous chapter. Tenderly letting her rest on one side of the couch, he grabbed a blanket and draped it over her to keep her warm, he also took the Garnet that they had received from Efreet out and placed it on her finger to dry her off. He turned to Presea and gently picked her up and placed her next to Sheena, temporarily taking off the blanket and placing Presea under it. Then, as an afterthought, Lloyd removed both of the gems that did not belong to Efreet.

Going into a rather conveniently placed storage closet, Lloyd brought out a mop, and became cleaning up the mess which Genis had caused. _I hope they recover soon, they might get that sickness, uh, what did Raine call it? Sypocania? The thing that you get when your body temperature takes a dangerous drop, well, the name doesn't matter, only that I remember it's bad._

As he was cleaning up the mess, Regal burst into the room, hiding stolen cookbooks behind his back, Lloyd was so occupied, he wouldn't notice a dragon choking down Genis, much less Regal holding stolen cookbooks. Regal didn't know that Lloyd was occupied, so he tried to play it cool like Zelos, not remembering that Zelos didn't escape the Flanoir mob, neither did he really.

"What's up Lloyd good buddy?" Regal was trying in everyway possible to be like Zelos. "Come on bud! Talk to me!" He slipped the cookbooks into the Bag for Holding Lots o' Stuff, which is where they kept everything from their journey, from Gels to Armor.

"Huh? Oh, hello Regal, did you find anything?" Lloyd desperately tried to leave the thought world he had put himself in. He leaned the mop against the wall, "What happened to Yuan?" Before Regal could answer, Lloyd cleaned up the cleaning materials by stuffing all of them into the storage closet. Regal patiently waited, no longer acting like Zelos as he was certain the cookbooks were safe. Lloyd then gave what Regal thought was his full attention to him, though in truth, Lloyd's mind was stuffed with feeling helpless over Presea and Sheena.

"Yuan? He, uh, went to bed." Regal was devious today, and it could only get worse. "I tried to persuade him to help, but he said he felt like his head was cleaved by Bahamut's Tear." _Oh yeah! I rock at lying! Zelos got nothing on this! _

"Poor Yuan…" Lloyd tried to get back to normal because Regal wasn't dumb, he'd realize what Presea didn't. "I mean, he should have helped, there is a psychopath in here and we have no idea what he or she looks like. I mean, it could be you for all we know."

"Are you suggesting something?" Regal asked, almost slipping back into Zelos mode.

"Of course not, I was just pointing out the possibility that it may be one of us, after all, Yuan did suspect us." Lloyd had to mentally keep himself from checking if Presea and Sheena were all right, a hard task indeed. He knew he could not do anything, but that couldn't stop him from worrying. It was also hard due to his relatively low intelligence, but he had seemed to be getting smarter after he ate a certain red plant. "What do you think everyone else is doing?"

As he had finished that sentence, Kratos and Raine burst into the room, each covered in a strange liquid. If hatred could be measured, then Raine at that time would be equivalent to that of a dwarf talking to a drow. Kratos on the other hand, seemed relieve for once, which could only mean one thing, the world had finally lost sanity. The staff Raine was carrying was broken in half, and she looked ready to kill the closest thing that made her angry in any way possible.

"Kratos, you nimrod! First, the item you said that there was a ruin and there wasn't, then you get us eaten by a DRAGON!" Raine almost screeched at the top of her voice. "I'm absolutely COVERED in dragon saliva, and SOMEONE is going to pay for the cleaning bill!" Raine then proceeded to start beating Kratos with her staff, unfortunately, as you should know unless your intelligence is the equivalent to that of a rock, dragons are magical in everyway possible. Therefore, Kratos did not even feel any pain as he was unmercifully bashed by Raine. Despite this immunity, Kratos could not do anything other then stand their like a dummy.

"Regal?" Lloyd continued speaking after watching his crazy half elfin teacher beat up, or try to beat up, his father. "Could you heal Sheena and Presea? We were shocked by an unfair trick played upon us by someone, and unless I'm wrong, which you know, I'm not, that someone is Genis! He had motive, opportunity, means, and he was the only other person in this room apart from Presea."

"I can heal them, but they may not wake up for a while." Regal prepared his healing spell. "HADOK-! Sorry, I mean, Grand Healer!" The healing spell did descend upon the two girls, who still did not move. "Well, I did what I could, now, let us watch as Raine brutally & viciously attack Kratos."

"Don't you think we should help?" Lloyd winced as he saw his teachers fury released upon his father. _Wow, he must be quite used to pain, she just slammed him in the head and he hasn't even winced! No wonder Mithos is so powerful, Da- Kratos, must be a great teacher._ "Hey Regal?" Lloyd was struck by a sudden thought which had appeared from out of nowhere. "What's a drow?"

"A drow?" Regal looked puzzled, "What is with the sudden curiosity, you didn't happen to see one did you?"

"No, I'm just unsure if a drow is what I think a drow is." Lloyd responded in the way that he would normally respond.

"A drow is a more evil form of Dark Elves, don't get me wrong, there are some nice drow but…" Regal paused as if a painful memory had just come up. "They are the ones credited for creating the first soul bearing exsphere; of course, they used a dwarf seeing as they are blood enemies."

"That's what I thought…" Lloyd did harken back to the day he spent in the cave after lighting Sheena on fire…

"_No hard feelings, right Sheena?" He asked after putting out the fire that he had set on her, accidentally of course, with the Sorcerer's Ring._

"_Sure, it isn't like I'm going to be attacked by entirely-EWW!" Sheena had screamed after finding the dead corpse of a dwarf. "AHHH!" She jumped away from the corpse, which was dead. "I've never seen a dead dwarf before…"_

"_Neither have I…" Lloyd noticed that Sheena was scared, quite unlike her, she normally kept her tough attitude on at all times, but now it seems that she was trusting Lloyd enough to let her normal, cowardly attitude show. "Look at this."_

_Lloyd picked up an arrow which was embedded in the dwarf's mithril armor. After examining it, unaware of Sheena staring at him oddly, realization hit him. "Sheena! This arrow has the poison which was mostly used by dark elves several centuries ago, they have long since disappeared. Which means this," he acknowledged the cave surrounding them, "was the battle site for one of the many Dark Elf & Dwarven wars!"_

"_Yeah and HOW will that help us get out?" Sheena asked sarcastically, "Come on, we have to hurry out."_

"So it must have been near the-" Lloyd stopped mid sentence. "Never mind, let's try and calm Raine down."

* * *

"My beautiful hunny, though I cannot see you, I know that we must be perfect for each other." Zelos was trying to persuade his female captor who was watching to make sure he did not escape. The others were doing Martel knows what. "What I would do to see you, I would go alone into a cave filled with 10,000 Wolves, with only a dagger and no magic or other items, for you, I would gladly renounce my title, just to see your beautiful face." 

At this the captor, called Raine, who wasn't the real Raine but the Raine impersonating the real Raine, felt her icy heart melt a bit. "Well, I suppose I should…"

"Thank you my darling, I know we could have a wonderfully charming life together." Zelos was taking mental notes. _Damn, these new pickup lines are awesome! I'll be lose, run from this gullible wannabe, and then warn the others._

"Of course, let me untie you…" Fake Raine took out a knife, "Now, I've never been good with knots, so just hold still whilst I cut the rope." She raised the knife, and drove it downwards with amazing speed, unfortunately, the rope was stronger then her, other then being thin and frayed anyway.

"Let me do it." Zelos grabbed the knife with his hands and easily cut through the rope. "Bye!" Zelos took off running.

"Martel grant me patience!" Fake Raine prayed as she ran after Zelos.

Unfortunately for the perverted chosen, Genis was going the opposite way, so it was just a manner of seconds till they meet at a point where they would collide.

"I have SO much power; I don't know what to do with it!" Genis went down the corridor, smacking straight into Zelos. "YOU INSIGNIFICANT FOOL! I WILL SMASH-oh dear…." Genis noticed the charging women behind him, "God, don't you have _ANY_ sense of honor, dignity, modesty?"

"Argue later!" Zelos picked up Genis and ran faster, "You see twerp, I had to shamelessly flirt to get out of the trap, don't worry, one day I'll teach you how to charm a girl!"

"I…hate you." Genis said, not enjoying being dragged along.

"You know you don't mean that." Zelos looked back and ran smack into Colette.

"I thought I got rid of you!" this fake Colette drew forth her weapon, a hammer! "Now, I will kill you until you die from it!"

Zelos had something no one ever thought he would have, a good idea. "You don't want to do that." He said as he put Genis down.

"Why not?" the phony asked with her hammer raised.

"See my buddy here?" He nudged Genis to play along. "He's a wizard, a master of doom. See this giant hole and scorched area with the dead corpses of the Sand Worms? It was made by this very magician says I! The gods TREMBLE before his power, that they may lack his favor, the very heavens shake as he commands the dead to share the power of lightning! And now you stand before him?"

"I don't buy it."

"His power will consume time, it will consume you!" Then he whispered to Genis, "Think of something!"

"I have Zelos, I have." Genis grabbed some sand from the ground, "Sand, I command thee to reveal thy glory and- BLIND MINE FOE!" As the fake Colette shielded her eyes, Genis started to run without actually throwing the sand. Zelos followed, running as if his very soul depended on it.

* * *

_I'm warm? What's the last thing that happened? Oh yes, I was hit by a water bucket and shocked. That was painful, but now I'm warm? I thought I'd be freezing if anything. And I'm not on the cold floor, but, a couch? What could have-_ Before Sheena could continue her sentence, she opened her eyes and while they came in focus, she spotted some pink. _Presea is okay too… I hope Lloyd is-wait, he must have been the one who put me here, he's so sweet! Presea looks cold, I had better keep her warm. _With that, Sheena embraced Presea, sharing her body warmth with the poor girl, the others did not notice, there was little movement involved, as Presea was already next to her. _I'll be up in a minute, just one more minute….._

* * *

Rydia: Just so you know, Sypocania is Hypothermia, but Lloyd didn't remember the name.

GM: You know the drill, read and review (if you want).


	6. Raine, you're EVIL!

**_Imildra_s: Wouldn't we all… But what was the Hotshots part?**

**_Zelda's Fox 38_: Sorry, I'm not familiar with that. How about Baulder's Gate II: Dark Alliance? And you can get one of those bags…but Czar's hoarding them, so good luck!**

**_MoonCannon_: Yes there is a Sheloyd scene here, but a light one, because revenge is taken! And don't be so pessimistic! It's your first fanfic! And the GenisxColette sequel was good, but I didn't get to review it.**

**_Lloyd (Irving) Aurion_: Weird? Not really, Genis has a melted brain, and Raine has finally lost her ever loving mind! The intelligent plant is a hybrid between the TP plant, and the strength plant. I made it up.**

**_SnowCrysta_l: They have a lot to do with the murder, and Genis has become…crazy, I'm glad you like him this way.**

**_ObviousMan_: Maybe it was, I just needed something for them to keep the stuff in. And Sheena sees Presea as a younger sister, what are you thinking?**

**_warprince2000_: I would have updated sooner, but the floppy I was working on became corrupted, so I had to type it ALL OVER AGAIN!**

**_goldfish demon_: That's because he was captured…**

* * *

GM: Alright, let us cut to the chase. I am incredibly angry, the file this chapter was originally on has been corrupted, so I have to type ALL OVER AGAIN! Anyway, **Disclaimer: Green Magicite does not own Tales of Sympthonia or Namco**

* * *

_I hate getting up. I love sleep…._ Sheena was in a battle of wills, versus herself. One half of her wanted to sleep, the other half knew it had to get up. I'm sure most of us, if not all, have encountered this evil. Sleep almost always wins; only in the direst of situations does it actually lose. This was, one of those dire situations. _Must fight it, must get up…_ Sheena looked at the young pink haired girl besides her. _I hope she is warm enough, Presea is like a sister to me. We're both orphans and suffered horrible tragedies, she more so than I._ Struggling to get up, Sheena somehow, most likely due to her ninja training, was able to get up silently and without the others noticing. Then bundling up Presea so she would stay warm and dry off instead of freezing to death in a desert, talk about ironic deaths; Sheena walked into the conversation. 

"I WILL MAKE SURE YOU DIE A HORRIBLE PAINFUL-" Raine cut off as she saw Sheena. Glaring at her like she was someone blowing up her favorite ruin while discriminating against half elves, she said, "You…"

"What? Am I missing something?" Regal asked, Raine had never liked Sheena, but this was hatred in pure unfiltered form. It's like she had a grudge against the assassin. As far as he had heard, they had been improving, but now a sudden change from Raine? Why? She was normally the calm one.

While all of this was happening, Kratos was off in Kratos-land, where there were soft pink bunnies, angry harpies, butterflies, insane minions, song birds, electric death. He really enjoyed it there. This is one of the reasons he was able to take the beating without flinching, other then the dragon saliva of course. The bunnies were in a ware with the insane minions, and all he could do was watch as the bunnies destroyed anything the minions could do. They were unstoppable in all their pink glory.

"All you do is cause trouble." Raine was no longer shouting, but her voice had become dark and chilling. "We should have just left you to die in Luin. If someone hadn't pushed Colette to save you," She glanced at Lloyd, her eyes almost on fire, "Then you would be dead, and everyone else, happy."

Sheena couldn't believe this. She and Raine had never been close, but this was just, just cruel. She had to be lying, she was needed, right? Her heart was beating rapidly in a cold sweat; she wouldn't be abandoned again, not again. These were her friends; she could trust them to the end. "Raine, you are out of your mind, now, I suggest you get back in." Another attempt at bravery, but Lloyd saw the hurt she was carrying.

"Hmph." Raine turned to Regal, "Didn't you say something about Presea?"

"No, where did you-" Regal was caught in a nudge by Lloyd, play along. "Yes, she might have Hypothermia, you should examine her. If she died," Regal looked away as he thought of Alicia, "I could never forgive myself."

"Of course I'll examine her." Raine glared at Sheena as she walked with Regal to the couch. She looked at Presea for a moment, felt her forehead, and then declared, "She doesn't have hypothermia you blubbering idiot! But I'll heal her." Raine started to cast Heal upon Presea.

Sheena walked away to a dark corner of the room, tears falling down her face. Only the most silent of sobs coming from her, her stature not changing, seeming to everyone but our brown haired hero that she was fine. Kratos was still in Kratos-land, and everyone else was busy. Lloyd walked over to her.

"Sheena…" Lloyd began, and then noticed the tears on her face. He gently wiped them away, then continued, "Raine is like that sometimes. Once, she through a brick at me in school, it hurt to." Sheena chuckled for a moment, then embraced Lloyd, slowly gasping.

"I, I just can't," Tears filled the summoner's eyes again. "I don't want to be abandoned again…" She finished, her voice showing the signs of despair.

"Sheena." Lloyd held the summoner. "I told you I would never leave you. And I won't." Sheena looked up at Lloyd, her eyes losing the red that had accompanied the tears. She leaned up and kissed him, Lloyd taken by surprise.

Kratos had just come back from Kratos-land. The pink bunnies had beaten the minions, and a new peace had come upon the land. He watched as Lloyd finished kissing Sheena, and chuckled to himself. _Well, well, well. When were you planning on telling me this? Not for a long time, I presume? I'd better be honest to you about Anna then…_ "Lloyd, may I speak to you over here?"

Lloyd walked over there, desperately trying to conceal the blush that had risen to his face on the fact that his father caught him kissing Sheena. Unsuccessful at best, he turned to his father, and stared him in the eye. "Yes Da-Kratos?"

"I need to tell you something about Anna." Kratos told his son, Lloyd froze, Kratos never spoke about Anna.

"What is it?" Lloyd listened intently for one of the few times in his life. He wanted to know everything about her, but, that is another story.

"Anna…" Kratos looked away in memory, "Was a half elf."

"Wha, what?" Lloyd was shocked, Kratos had to be lying, "But I passed the half-elf test in Syback!" Lloyd passed the test, it was to determine if you had elfin blood in you or not, plain and simple, he couldn't be a half elf.

"That can only tell if you are half human, half elf." Kratos responded. "I should have told you earlier." Kratos ran his hand through his hair, muttering something about how technology has many weaknesses. Something else was mixed in there about 'back in the day', which was incoherent.

"Does human technology suck so much that it can't even tell more then a specific amount?" Lloyd asked his father in disbelief.

"Yes." Kratos sighed, it was true how human technology could fail like this.

"Does that mean I can use magic?" Lloyd asked eagerly.

"Yes." Kratos sighed a second time, this is how Lloyd was about everything, excited, then bored to death.

"Cool." Lloyd was happy, he thought it was something about him and Sheena Kratos wanted to talk about.

"That isn't all." Lloyd turned around. "I saw you kissing Sheena. When were you planning on telling me?"

"After Sheena and I got back from our exsphere journey…" Lloyd hadn't planned on it, so he just said the first thing that came out of his mind. "We are going to find all of them and destroy them."

"I'm proud of you." Kratos silently chuckled as his son simply stared at him, "You've grown."

"Don't tell the others, I'll do it when Sheena and I get back." Lloyd pleaded his father. "Please, its better that they hear it from me."

"I'll keep your secret." Kratos assured Lloyd, who had the greatest look of relief on his face, "Just…don't lose her like I lost Anna." He sadly ordered his son.

"Thank you…dad. And I will never let her get hurt…" Lloyd promised and looked back at Sheena. "Dad, I'm going to go tell Sheena you know now, 'k?" Lloyd began to step away from the man he had finally accepted as his father.

"Go ahead son." Kratos smiled, Lloyd had called him 'dad'. He decided to go and check on Regal and Raine, see how they were treating Presea. He moved over to the couch, where the pink head had woken up. "How is she doing?" Kratos then took a distance, away from the couch, but close enough to hear.

"Fine, but she's not going to be if she does stupid things like this again." Raine shook her head, then sighed. "Kids today, no sense at all."

"I wouldn't be so sure of that." Kratos thought of his son and his eventually-to-be daughter-in-law. They had sense; they were perfect soul mates for each other, each covering the others weakness. "Presea, are you feeling alright?"

"Yes Kratos, I am fine." Presea coughed, showing that she wasn't fine, she needed a doctor or something of the sort. Her body frail, and she herself was rather pale.

"Fine?" Regal looked accusingly at Raine, "This does not qualify as 'fine'!" Regal was losing control over the pain of someone close to his dead love. "Heal her. She needs to live!"

"Alright!" Raine began to cast a spell that would cure the girl, as Zelos and Genis burst in, knocking Kratos into the wall, and making a Kratos imprint.

"Sorry about rushing in like this, but we're being chased by two hot women, which I'd normally be fine with, but they're trying to kill us." Zelos gave a quick explanation. "So, where am I supposed to hide? The closet?"

"PRESEA!" Genis noticed his pink haired crush, and hurried over to her fallen form. He through his sister out of the way, then Regal, both of them landing far from the couch, "Presea, I, I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you, I swear!" Genis stared into her eyes, then turned away as the guilt overtook him. "Presea…It was me who put the bucket of water over the door; I'd take it back if I could…Forgive me?"

"It's…alright Genis." Presea responded after several seconds which seemed like eternity. "I forgive you."

"Thank you!" Genis would have kissed Presea, if it wasn't for the intrusion of the phonies.

"We've go you now!" The fake Raine declared, not noticing that they were outnumbered, and outclassed.

"I'll show you pathetic humans!" Genis murmured to himself as he let his anger overtake him. He began casting the spell that the elves had taught him, Meteor Storm. This time, he felt another magic combined with his, and the words coming from another person as well.

"I ask for thy blessing, grant this storm of meteors, of infinite powers, unmatched throughout Sylverant & Tethealla, have the power of the holy light, the power to stand against the universe, to take a form which would save the souls of many…**_HOLY METEOR JUDGMENT STORM_**!" The real Colette, who had emerged from a side room, joined her angelic magic with Genis', to create the majestic power which was starting now.

Giant Meteors, seemingly made of light, crashed onto the two imposters, direct hits each time. Every time the light meteor hit, the spell Holy Lance arose from the powered ashes of light. It was so powerful that ever person, who wasn't being blown up, hair became frazzled, Kratos', Raine's, and Genis' also standing up because of their experience with magic.


	7. Farewell Yuan, we knew ye too well

**_Zelda's Fox 38: It does destroy the building, and Raine has her reasons… she lost her sanity after the unfortunate incident with a Noishe where she tried to dissect him and he threw her into the fiery depths of Korriban. Ha! Video games don't have gremlins; they have the horror known as IMPS!_**

**_ObviousMan: To quote Sabin, "Riiiiight…" This was originally supposed to be a murder fic, where each character was slowly killed off. I needed a spell that would destroy the building and finish off the pink haired idiot Zelos._**

**_Lloyd Irving Aurion: Thanks._**

**_MoonCannon: Yeah, I'm not the best with romance, I'll stick to horrible painful death and humor. Good luck._**

_**Pink bunny: Who doesn't?**_

_**Dead-Ed-Boy: Ah, the murder is right under their nose. You see, in Flanoir, if you choose Sheena instead of Colette, (you can say 'no') then Sheena goes.**_

_**Yoshinayosh: Yuan is still in the basement.**_

**_Capricorn Chaos: Yuan. In. Basement._**

_**I'VE BEEN BUSY!**_

GM: Ah, the last chapter, finally. Most likely, I will only make one more fic, one that contains Sheeloyd, Gesea, Rycard, and Cosa. Oh, and Czar has a cameo.

Czar: Finally someone pays attention to me…

GM: It's okay, you were only taken out… and because I'm busy, I'm promoting you to Fanboy Slayer.

Czar: Really? EXCELLENT! Runs off to FF VII Tech Demo Forum

GM: Now, for the featured presentation.

Bane: I just translated your strange language, Obvious Man; it has something to do with Linen?

GM: Ah, and this does not imply Colette x Fake Genis

**DISCLAIMER: Green Magicite does not own Tales of Symphonia, Namco, or Czar.**

* * *

It was cold, one of the coldest days Flanoir has ever experienced. A lone figure dropped from the sky, holding what looked like a full burlap sack. His entire face was covered by a red mask, and his suit was similar to those of Mizuho. 

Silent as death, he moved closer and closer to the town of Flanoir, his feet not leaving prints to be followed, and the snow not clinging to the fabric as it fell. Once he came unto the town, he slipped into the Inn's second floor window with the help of a deck of rather risqué playing cards that he had found near the waterfront, which he was disgusted with. They must have belonged to the Idiot Chosen.

In the Inn, he stood still, fearing that Sheena may have actually practiced her Ninja Technique and would detect him.

_One day, just one day, Sheena, and your end shall come, and I will laugh over your broken body, how I will laugh…._

Swiftly he picked the lock of the girl's room, and found his target, the Blond. Carefully, he emptied the sack, revealing the False Chosen.

"It took you long enough!" She whispered, and put on the fake wings.

"I did all you asked, I killed the Wonder Chef, and I brought you to her. Remember, you must kill the pink haired male, which is my fee." The assassin told the False One.

"Of course, now take her and go!"

With that, the assassin used Mithoform to drug Colette, and snuck off to the Renegade Base in Sylverant, leaving the False Chosen to take Colette's place.

Swift as a falcon, he hurried to the Tethealla base, and used the portal, as opposed to the way of air. As he stepped through and entered the familiar area, he jumped into a nearby laundry shaft, which took him to the unknown dungeon which Yuan had forgotten he had installed.

"Here she is." The masked one told the false group that was there, IE Fake Genis, Fake Lloyd, & Fake Raine.

"Excellent." Fake Lloyd took the girl, and locked her away. "'Genis' and I will watch over her."

"I'll wait." The Fake Raine smirked, and then headed away. The assassin, who shall remain nameless, poofed away in a smoke bomb.

So Fake Raine went off, leaving the two boys to watch over the captive, who was not yet awake.

"Want to play checkers?" Fake Genis asked.

"Sure."

And so, the checkers were played. It was quite a long time before Colette awoke, but for the sake of word count, I'll tell you who won the 20 games they played.

Fake Genis won, then Fake Genis again, then Fake Lloyd, then Fake Genis, followed by Fake Genis, and then Fake Genis. Fake Lloyd won, well, he did knock out Fake Genis, so…. Then Fake Genis won. Then Fake Genis again. Then Fake Genis won another game. Fake Lloyd then bashed Fake Genis over the head with the board, and won the next ten games because Fake Genis was basically dead for a time.

After the cheap game, Fake Lloyd used a Life Bottle on his brother, and Colette awoke.

"Where am I?" Were the first words from the angelic girl's mouth.

"IN THE FLAMING PITS OF—"Fake Lloyd looked to his brother, and back to Colette, both having some strange expressions on their faces. "What?"

"Is he always this odd?" Colette looked to Fake Genis.

"Yeah, he is always like this. It's horrible, sometimes, having to put up with his randomness." He answered, shivering.

"I AM NOT RANDOM!" Shouted the false one.

"Never believe anything he says." Fake Genis whispered to Colette.

"Got it. Any other information on him?" Colette asked, hoping to escape. She wasn't completely useless, not all the time, at least. Sure, she lost her soul willingly, sure she was kidnapped and couldn't even save her friends, sure she almost caused Lloyd to die several times, but she wasn't completely useless.

"Well, he's an egomaniac and thinks he can beat anyone in battle." Fake Genis answered again, while Fake Lloyd sputtered some idiotic nonsense.

"Thanks." Colette smiled at Fake Genis, and then shouted to Fake Lloyd, "You know, I heard Fake Raine beat you at a weapon contest."

"SHE DID NOT!" Fake Lloyd shouted to the girl.

"Well, there is only one way to find out; fight me." Colette demanded. "Unless you aren't man enough to take on a weak blond in psychical combat."

Fake Lloyd threw her chackrams to her, and then opened the cell. "BRING IT!" He brandished a plastic sword.

"ANGEL FEATHERS!" Fake Lloyd was toasted.

Colette ran up the staircase, leaving Fake Genis behind….

* * *

Yuan and Botta

"We've made it, Howard!" Yuan cried as they found light.

"Botta, sir." Boatta replied, once again correcting the mistake of his name.

"Whatever, George, we've hit light!"

"I hate you…"

"Of course, Right Hand Man Goward."

Yuan and Botta went into the light, and found something amazing…

"OH SWEET MARTEL!" Were Yuan's last words as he died, Botta, however, lived on and helped the thing, which shall remain anonymous, who ate Yuan, because face it, Yuan was getting on his nerves.

* * *

Colette ran and ran, farther and farther up the base, and she saw Genis, and added her own holy ability to his Meteor Storm…… 

The dust cleared, the pure meteors stopped falling, only one person was dead, mind you.

"You killed Zelos!" Shouted Raine.

"Wait, why aren't we dead?" The two imposters asked...

"I was aiming for Zelos." Genis looked around him, "What happened to the base? And why is the body of the Wonder Chef here too?"

A puff of Ice appeared, and everyone's favorite summon spirit of ToS appeared! "I believe I can explain that." She sipped her Iced Tea. "I teleported you out as the building was demolished, and then teleported the Wonder Chef here. All in exchange for a recipe."

"It twas I! The Miracle Chef!" In came a woman, holding a giant spoon.

"I hate my life…" Genis looked away, dejected. He hated all of it; humans, elves, even other half elves…

Presea moved over to Genis, "Genis, I am afraid that my attacking you may have damaged your brain cells…. I apologize. Will you forgive me?"

Genis looked into Presea's kind eyes, and his anger, hate, insanity; it all washed away. "Of course, Presea… you're the only thing that doesn't harm me, like Raine…" He whispered the last two words, and fell into Presea's comforting embrace, slightly crying.

Lloyd had stopped guarding Sheena, and they were standing together, watching Genis and Presea. "How did he find his soul mate before I did?" Lloyd asked to himself.

"Because, Lloyd, you're an idiot." Sheena responded, but with mirth and seriousness all at once. "But you're _my_ idiot." With that, she gave him a quick, and unnoticed by the other members, kiss on the cheek.

_Pink bunnies… OH NO! THE RABID YELLOW CHEESEGRATERS HAVE INVADED! _Kratos land was being invaded by insanity, we're doomed….

The Miracle Chef went over to the Wonder Chef, and stuffed a Life Omelet up his throat. To everyone's surprise, he came back to life.

"Aww… I missed you too, my love." The Wonder Chef kissed the Miracle Chef, and dropped his disguise, revealing Frank.

"DAD?" Colette screeched. "Is that… mom?"

"Yes, I haven't seen you for years, my dear, are you alright?" The Miracle Chef took off her disguise as well, revealing a beautiful blond with hair that was like Colette's.

"It is you!" Colette jumped into the Miracle Chef's arms, and began asking her several questions, which we will skip.

The false ones were taken away, and forced to do the cruelest of labor, food testing at the cooking school Raine was scheduled to go to.

Sheena nudged Lloyd, and gave him a look, which he, against all odds and all forces of nature AND balance, understood.

"I have an announcement to make." Lloyd stopped the randomness, and looked at the crowd, who were all looking at him except Kratos & Regal, bunnies and cookbooks. "Sheena and I are going to collect all the Exspheres when Mithos is defeated. And, and—I love her."

Silence eerily settled. Lloyd loved someone? HE NOTICED SOMEONE'S FEELINGS!

Sheena, wanting to make sure everyone got the message and knew it wasn't a joke, pulled Lloyd down by his collar and kissed him, Lloyd almost fainted at the love-filled kiss that his girlfriend gave him.

It was Genis who broke the silence; he fell to the ground when Presea released him suddenly after seeing the kiss. "Ow!"

After that, everyone laughed, simply laughed. They still had their quest, but life was better for everyone, even Kratos, who had successfully stopped the Yellow Cheese Grater invasion.

* * *

I'm sorry if it was bad, I-I've lost my will to write. Mostly. 

Poll: Should I make the Final Fantasy IV – ToS crossover?


End file.
